I sometimes joke:
“Let’s create a Patriarchy. That is the males in charge. Well. We will send the women out to work. When they have finished their day, the can do all the housework and in the bedroom, they can provide to the man’s every fancy.
That sounds remarkably like what we have at present.”
“Let’s create a Matriarchy. That is the females in charge. Well. We’ll send the males out to work in the factory early in the morning. When they have gone off to work, we shall set off in the pram to the park and feed the ducks. Then, off to the beach for a paddle and swim. Then we shall go to the cafés for lunch. Then off to visit friends and back home in time to knock up a bit of food when the male slave comes home tired from the factory. Oh, and the male can hand over his wage packet to me on Fridays.
That sounds like what happened when I was a child in the 1950s.”
I’m thinking that Patriarchy was Matriarchy in disguise so that men did not realise. Many females call it: “Women’s Secret”.
Patriarchy was the best weapon that women ever had to control male behaviour. Males were expected to run the entire society. But they were required to run the society entirely for the benefit of women and children. A man was expected to lay down his life for his woman. His value was less than his woman and her children. In fact, he was expected to lay down his life for any woman! His value was lower than all women. He was expendable. I have to work hard for status, money, and assets. Without assets and income, I am valueless. Homeless men never have girlfriends.
The system set up by our ancestors was designed to impose on males a set of duties useful to society and to impose on females duties that are useful to society. Our ancestors did not load females with the drudgery of providing the staples of life. The man was put out to work and the woman was given the freedom of the house. Males were trained from an early age that they were the providers. They should ‘toughen up’ and take it ‘like a man’. And thus they would work down a coalmine for twelve hours a day and live a life of black dust with no daylight so that he provided for a wife and children. His training was harsh and tough. If he complied, he was a ‘good family man’. If he did not, he was a ‘waster’. If he hit his wife, he was tied to a whipping post and lashed by other men in the community. The roles were divided so that the two did not quarrel.
Even the definition of ‘good man’ is written in favour of females. ‘He is a good man’ means he ‘looks after his wife and children. He is selfless.’ Manliness was described in terms of what is useful to women. The last thing women want to do is to destroy patriarchy. It is patriarchy that allowed women to control men through societal control.
by Andy Chalkley